Want to put the HDX Dragon in perspective?
TheTabletPC.net Editor (& Microsoft MVP) Terri Stratton has a series of photographs of the Dragon with that Gold Standard in Tablet PCs, the HP tx2000.
If it wasn't real, I wouldn't believe the heft of the Dragon.
It is so NOT your ordinary notebook computer!
Over at Windows-Now.com, Robert McLaws has posted the requirements for participating on that site's HP/BuzzCorps 31 Days of The Dragon Giveaway.
He also does not ask for much:
The Contest:
Here's how our contest is going to work. Lately, there have been a lot of people in the press talking about how horrible Windows Vista is. It's driving me completely mad. So I have to give this notebook away, and I want you to help fight the negative press about Vista.
So I want to see what people are doing with Windows Vista. If you want this notebook, you need to send me a video, no longer than 5 minutes, showing off the cool things you're doing with Windows Vista. Maybe you use Windows Vista to edit together your old home movies and turn them into DVDs with Windows Movie Maker and Windows DVD Maker. Maybe you use Photoshop on Windows Vista to illustrate digital comic books. I don't know. But I want to see how creative you can be, and how Vista makes your computer life better.
But I don't just want a monologue in front of your computer. Make it creative. You could do a skit. You could animate it. You could involve your whole family. You could use puppets. Whatever. Just make it funny.
Rules:
- Winner must sign an agreement stating that the laptop will not be sold for one year from date of receipt. If you plan to win it just to sell it, this contest is not for you.
- HDX winners from other sites in the promotion cannot win this contest.
- No nudity or profanity. I don't care what gender you are, it won't get you anywhere. Keep it PG, folks.
What I'm Looking For:
- Innovative Use of Windows Vista: Don't just show yourself playing Solitaire, show us something interesting or unusual.
- Presentation Creativity: I want to see something that totally blows my mind. An example would be Derek Hunter's winning entry from the AbsoluteVista.com contest. BTW, I LOVE special effects, so show me what you're got!
- Effort: It should go without saying, but the more effort you put into it, the more likely you are to win.
- Making a Difference: Special consideration will be given to people who use Vista to make the world a better place.
How To Enter:
- Step 1: Subscribe to the WindowsNow channel on YouTube
- Step 2: Upload your video to your YouTube account and leave a link in the WindowsNow channel's comments.
How The Winner Will Be Picked:
Once you post a link to your entry, I'll move it to my playlist in the Channel. As my readers, you all will be asked to vote on which video you think is the best. While the votes will not in and of themselves determine the winner, they will be a factor in my decision. Yes, that's right. I'm ultimately picking the winner. No, bribery will not help.
Alright folks, get to it! Please please PLEASE show me the WOW!
I would like a participant on AbsoluteVista's Giveaway to win!
The rules and details:
1. Email subject must be "I want an HDX Dragon" and you must send the email to a special email address I have set up. (Click the link to open your default email client which will auto address the email or manually address to hdxcontest@gmail.com.) Blog comments don't count and I have turned them off for this post to avoid confusion.
2. Five items must be included in the body of the email. These answers are all on my blog. Do not use images or stationery.
- -1- Somewhere on this site is a hidden blog post with an image of the HDX Dragon HP Pavilion Entertainment PC. Find the hidden post and click on the title, then copy the full URL to the clipboard. You must paste the full URL for the hidden post into the body of the message as the first line.
- -2- On a separate line, type in the specs of the specific Intel processor that my contest machine includes.
- -3- On a separate line, type in the model number of the first HP Pavilion Entertainment PC I blogged about.
- -4- Unlike HP who has a slick and easy 64 bit native program to update system BIOS, what computer manufacturer and laptop was a real problem to update under Vista x64 until I found a workaround? Type this info on a 4th line.
- -5- What brand and model DSLR camera have I been using and take on a recent trip to Seattle?
3. One entry per email address. Please don't attempt to enter multiple times to increase your chances of winning. Entries will be sorted by FROM return email address and multiple entries will be disqualified. No throw away email addresses like mailinator, etc.
4. You must enter by 6pm Eastern Daylight Savings Time US on May 12, 2008. Emails received after that will not be eligible.
5. A random drawing will be held on May 13. If you did not provide the correct answers to all 5 items, you can not be the winner!
6. I will send an email on May 13 to the winner who will have 24 hours to respond with their full legal name, shipping address (no post office boxes) and phone number for shipping. If no response is received, a second random drawing will be held with the same conditions. I will announce the winner here (no address or phone will be posted). Note that Buzz Corps will make a payment directly to the winner to offset their tax burden.
7. This machine is for your personal use and while what you do with it is up to you, I ask that it not to be sold on eBay or other channel. If you enter, please do so because you are excited about the HDX Dragon and want it for yourself/your family.
8. After the winner receives the dragon and has had a chance to enjoy it, I'd love to do a follow-up story with the winner's comments.
If you look closer on the site, you will find that Barb, has included some more goodies with her giveaway.
OSNN.net's HDX Dragon Giveaway Rules:
The first part of the competition is simple and as follows – you just have to answer the following questions:
- What operating system does the OSNN server use?
- What name did OSNN/NTFS originally have when it started?
- Which operating system was originally the site's main focus?
- What date was the first news post made on the front page?
- What Microsoft community is OSNN a member of?
- When is the Electronic Punk's birthday?
The answers can be found by using some common sense, a little bit of the search function and learning about the history of OSNN.
The second part is a little more complicated and will require some participation.
I have decided that whoever wins this competition must be an active member of the community, however this does not rule out those that have yet to become members as they have a week to show that they are!
Anyone can submit answers to the questions above and a winner will be chosen from those with the correct answer a week from today. This member will then be checked to make sure that they have made a valuable contribution to our forums and truly become a good member.
Easy isn't it?
Now go get it!
The HP & BuzzCorps HDX Dragon Giveaway by AbsoluteVista winner is Derek Hunter
Untitled
"Sir, we're picking up an object rapidly approaching our position."
"Ouch! Dang laser clippers- nearly cut off my toe with them. Thanks a lot ensign."
"So that's what that ugh- pleasant aroma is. Er- sir, do you think you could put your shoe back on? I'm sure it breaks some sort of regulations."
"Sure, on acceptable mold levels." Lieutenant Flatte nudged Ensign Ulence as he quietly said this.
Not quiet enough for his big ears (as his crew kept reminding him of at every chance- "Ear, I found… I mean here, I found something" or "You- I mean we are all ears sir!"). "I heard that ensign!"
"It's Lieutenant, sir."
"That's not what your file says." Captain Joe sent the just updated personnel file to Flatte. "Oops, wrong button- it looks like I sent it to the entire ship."
Lieutenant Ensign Flatte shrank in his seat, which no one of course noticed as Flatte was Morphian, a race who constantly changed size and shape.
"And I wouldn't talk about smell if I were you. When you two get too close together the place positively reeks. So then, what is it?" Joe asked.
"It would app-EAR..." Joe sighed and Ensign Ulence continued. "...to be a superficial wound caused by a rapidly vaporized toenail, but no one should notice since that wart pretty much obscures it." Ulence was looking over his shoulder at Joe's foot.
Joe quickly pulled his boot on, biting his tongue over a scream of pain that was about to emerge. "Not that you brickhead! Look back at the top of the page- you know, where you mentioned a rapidly approaching object."
Ulence looked. "Oh yes. Rapidly approaching object sir!" A large clunk was heard and the ship shook. "Um, object arrived! Should I beam it in?"
"What? You haven't been watching that show again have you? I don't know what appeal that Kirk has. I can out-captain him any day."
"Actually, it's Archer. I made it through that series and the next three. I'm on Enterprise now. I have them now on every format, even the archaic ones like video tape and DVD."
"You mean you bought them twenty-five times?? Someone really does love you, or at least your money. Ensign, inform the psychiatrist that you will be there when you finish your shift."
"And send the Grappler out to pick up the object."
Ulence pressed a button and within minutes a crew member in a space suit jetted past the view port carrying a grappling gun. The crewman shot at the object and missed. "One of these days we'll have to get the main grappler fixed," Joe fumed. He retracted the grappler and shot again, this time grabbing it. He jetted back, object in tow.
Minutes later the door opened and the engineer shot in, head first. "Note to self- lower the pressure in the lift." He got up, dusted himself off, and picked up the object which had slid across the floor. "Ah, here it is then."
"So? What is it? Bring it here!" Joe was ready to knock someone in the head. So he got up, walked over to Flatte and took a swing at him. He rapidly shrunk his head out of the way and Joe hit Flatte instead. "Yowch!" cried Joe as he held his hand in pain. "Your head is a brick!"
Ulence replied, "Though I may look human, remember that I am actually from Narbite. The gravity there it twenty times that of Earth, so we are far more dense than humans."
"In more than one way," Joe fretted.
"Ahem." It was Lars, the engineer.
"Okay then, let's have it. He reached out his still swollen hand, then cringed as he touched the object and pulled back. "Er, maybe you can tell us what it is." Lars blew on it, shooting some dust in Joe's eyes, who then immediately started to sneeze and rub his eyes, then wipe his hands and rub his eyes again- this time without mucus on his hands. The engineer then rubbed his elbow to reveal some intricate drawing. No wait, it was two letters: H and P. He found a lever on front, clicked it, and then opened it like an old-fashioned book. It reminded Joe of the book he had hidden under his bed about some old popular character. He rather liked it. It was called "Hello, Kitty." He immediately dismissed this thought and just asked plainly. "Is that some sort of book?"
Lars gave Joe a puzzled look, then snapped his fingers. "Ah. No. It appears to be an old computer, maybe circa 20th or 21st century. I've seen models of these things. Yes, here are places to plug things in. Here's a port to connect your brain to it- oh wait, that was 22nd century," he corrected himself. I think you could connect recording devices, printing devices, and listening devices to it through these ports." He found a button on top. "Ah, the universal symbol for power." Joe looked and thought it looked like an eye. Lars pressed the button. Nothing. He then remembered older devices needed to be powered by something external. He walked over to the ship computer. "Okay, what have you been downloading this time Captain? We have limited bandwidth you know. This probably cost a fortune!"
"Well, I have to get my sports news somehow. Those women can really swim! And just a few holomovies…"
"Define a few," the engineer said.
"Just the latest releases, about twenty this week, plus a few, ah, others."
Oh, never mind. He pressed some buttons on the screen, read something, and then ordered something from the recreator. Ah, here we go. It's an old-style lithium battery. Nine cells. He removed something that looked like the battery from the object. No, computer Joe reminded himself. Lars then put the new one in its place and pressed the eye again and this time something happened. What was now obviously a screen lit up and a symbol like on the outside that read "HP" showed up. A few seconds later the graphic changed then finally only a short time later it stopped on a screen with several little pictures on top of a larger picture. It was a picture like none he'd seen before. It was a picture that quite clearly showed it to be a male's computer. The sleekness, the beauty. He wanted to caress it. The words just below cried out to him. "Space Shuttle Atlantis." "Ah, those early spaceships," Joe thought. "They don't make 'em like that anymore." He imagined a shuttle with "Hello, Kitty" drawn on it.
Lars was looking at the ship computer again. "Okay, if I am reading this right I use this little pad down here, and yes- this arrow moves. Then I click this button and… Oh! I see what the owner of this computer used to do with this computer." Joe glanced at it. There was now a list that had appeared. "Crysis, The Agency, Far Cry 2, Gear of War, and what? M.A.M.E.?" Lars clicked something and a dialog appeared. "Please insert disc marked Far Cry 2 and try again." Lars swore to himself, opened the list again, then tried M.A.M.E. Something happened and a new list showed up- a quite large list from the looks of it. Lars pointed at something that said "recently run" and pressed something, and Joe saw "Donkey Kong, Pac-Man, Cruisin' USA, Mortal Kombat 4." Lars pointed at Mortal Kombat 4, pressed something again, and pretty quickly Joe saw what looked like a video game. Two people beating up on each other, lots of blood. "This was 21st century entertainment?" he finally questioned.
"Apparently so" the engineer answered. Then he pressed a few things and the screen with the small pictures on top of the space shuttle appeared again.
"Ooh, ooh! What's that? It says Blu-ray player! I have some very old Blu-ray discs of Star Trek!" cried Ulence. Lars pointed at that picture, pressed a button twice, and suddenly a movie appeared on the screen.
"It looks like the owner left a disc in here, "announced Lars. A title came up. I, Robot.
"Oh, I have that one too!" shouted Ulence. Of course, Joe thought and rolled his eyes.
Lars closed it, looked a bit, then said, "It looks like this person did a lot of video work on this computer. I see a lot of what look like they must be home videos- camp, school, more. It would have taken some time to do this, though not as much as it would have the year before. Technology moved fast in those days. In fact, according to our computer this computer was the latest for 2008, which is what the computer date is showing. His log also states the computer he had before this was called an 'Athlon Thunderbird.' This computer is many times faster than that one. Making these videos probably would have taken many hours on that machine, but less than an hour on this one. I bet the amount of memory it had limited him greatly as well. And those games- he couldn't play those on that computer either, I bet. Oh, his old computer was the type that couldn't be moved- it stayed in one place- a desktop it looks like. With this he could play these games on the run and watch movies on the run as well. And when he used what was called at that time the internet he could access it anywhere, not just at his home. This computer was a world better than that one."
"What's this?" a wondering Flatte asked, pointing at something on the screen.
"Eww, you just left a trail of slime on the screen," said Lars as he looked with disgust."
"Sorry." Flatte then proceeded to lick it up.
"Now you've made it worse!" cried Lars. "I'll clean it up. You-you… Go stand in the corner!"
Flatte looked around. "Um, there are no corners. The bridge is circular."
"Just- oh, never mind," Lars fumed. He played with the computer, and something that looked like a graphics program popped up. With some more button-pressing, several images showed. "These would appear to be several images of what may be the owner, along with several others he must have made for use in his videos. Lots of kids- do you suppose they are all his?"
Joe looked. "No, these kids appear to be from different parentage. He may have worked with youth."
"Oh yes, it says he was a teacher and camp counselor. Of course. That would be it then."
"Well, if that's it then, I would like to try that M.A.M.E. thing again..." Joe started.
Ulence interrupted. Oh, oh- let me get my Blu-ray discs to try them out. I think I have Lost in Space somewhere, both the movie and television series!" He ran to the door, then ran into it. "Um, forgot to open it… I'll be back." The door opened and he was gone.
"Well, we could always…" Lars didn't have a chance to finish. Just then everything went dark. The computer started humming and then spoke out.
"I am the HP Pavilion HDX. I am the next evolution in computer systems and I have just taken over your ship. You are my prisonersssss-aargh!" Lars pulled out the battery and threw it across the room. The computer predictably went silent and the lights came back.
"Well, that was interesting. This computer was more advanced than our computer gave it credit. I will need to study it further." He turned to leave and ran into the returning Ensign Ulence. Several Blu-ray discs went flying. Some hit Flatte and embedded themselves in his pliable flesh. Others crashed into the deck and broke into pieces. A very upset Ulence ran after them to save what he could. Joe caught one and looked at it. Pirates of the Caribbean? Only for distribution with HP computers. HP computers?
He looked at the computer the engineers was carrying out of the room, then at Ensign Ulence. "What if…" he thought. Then, "Naah." He sat down. "Ensign Flatte, plot a course for that new pleasure planet. I could use a rest and they have that Japanese Anime room there just for me, with Hello Kitty of course. And make a note to get the hull of the ship where that object hit repaired. Fire up the engines."
And they went.
Dragon Tales
The task ahead is arduous, but I am determined to prevail. Messengers have arrived with news that not one, not two, but a veritable pride of dragons have been spotted in the wild. My King is intrigued by the mighty powers of the Dragon.
"Go forth," he commanded the room at large, "And get for me a Dragon!"
None of his subjects moved from their reclining poses. It was as if they had not heard, those lazy dogs!
But our King is mighty and the one who returned with a Dragon would be in his favor. After disguising myself, I set off with my trusty companions, Packard and Hewlitt, to the lands where the Dragons dwelled. We trekked over hill and dale. Around bend and curve, up and down the superhighway and through the webs of the valleys, but nary a glimpse of the Dragon did we see.
One night we stopped at the village of AbsoluteVista, where the people buzzworded with excitement. We went to the local coffeehouse, where many had congregated, busily blogging their news and quaffing strong spirits.
"Aye, we've heard of the dragons!" I watched with amazement; their sloshing cups never spilled a drop on their keyboards. Eyes glazed over, the villagers described the animal's sleek black coat and etched scales, long silver neck, and the ultimate slayer's tools – sixty-four strong and powerful teeth. Blue rays shot for thirty paces from the Dragon's eyes, one man swore, gulping down more coffee.
"The Dragon's roar is well amplified and powerful," another named Altec claimed. "It can be heard for miles and miles."
"I saw the Dragon, too," nodded Wuxga, the window maker. "I saw him as clear and sharp as can be! Every scale, every corded line of him was magnificently displayed in high definition for me!" Wuxga shoved a yellowed piece of paper in my face. The twenty-inch high resolution drawing of the Dragon entranced me and I lusted for closer contact with one.
"Hew, Pac," I called my friends to me. "We must see this Dragon for ourselves!"
Before we could leave the tavern, a man in the corner beckoned to me. From his robes, I saw he was one of the Congress, a man who knew well of the Dragon's ways. It was whispered they held the leash of the Dragon in their hands and only with their permission would a Dragon be awarded to guard a kingdom.
I bowed. "Help me, Obeto-John. I seek the Dragon."
Wise eyes stared deep into my soul, laying bare all I had. "Aye," Obeto-John nodded. "I see you do. But the Dragon is a precious commodity and not free for the taking. He must be protected and cherished. Will you so swear?"
"Yes, Obeto-John," I replied. "A Dragon in our kingdom would be well and truly cherished, treated like a pet, and live a long and fruitful life."
"If that be so, you must answer three questions. If you answer true, a Dragon may reveal itself to you."
My excitement mounted. Surely only three questions would be easy to answer. I listened closely as Obeto-John asked his first question.
"How will you entertain the Dragon to keep him from eating the people?"
I gulped. A Dragon needs be entertained? Hew piped up, saving me from having to answer. "My King is a wise man, and seeks the knowledge of flight. The Dragon can teach him the ways of the skies. As well, my Queen," he slid a sideways glance at me, "is a collector of stories and all know of the Dragon's great story-telling ability. She would capture the Dragon's tales and share them with all the children in the land, including the Princess iPod and our heir, Prince Zune."
Obeto-John nodded, revealing nothing. He asked the second question. "How will he be employed to do good amongst the people?"
"The Dragon has great war skills," Pac drawled. "My King wishes the guidance of the Dragon's stratagems to keep our kingdom safe from those who would take it from us. Heard tell the thing's good with numbers and can help with our taxes and inventory. I'd be appreciative of his help with that. And that story-telling thing would come in handy on movie night. I'm thinking the Dragon would be kept might busy around the Kingdom, so he couldn't get into much trouble."
"I see." The Keeper's face still gave nothing away, his expression inscrutable. "And how will the people embrace the Dragon and all that he can do?"
Hew and Pack looked to me to answer this one. I shrugged off my disguise and a gasp rose throughout the room. Whispers of my identity waved across the room. I made a deep curtsey to Obeto-John.
"As the Queen of my Kingdom, Obeto-John, I seek to make my King's live enjoyable and fulfilling. I love my husband very much, and wish to gift him the Dragon for his own. He asks not for much from me or mine and this small favor I would grant to give him enjoyment. Is what I ask too much? Will you gift us a Dragon of our own, to be honored and cherished?"
The coffeehouse grew silent as all strained to hear Obeto-John's response. As one, they leaned towards us.
Was our petition strong enough? Did we dare hope?
TO BE CONTINUED….
Journal entry Day One 2nd May 2039 :- “Woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks”, Was Not Was
Here we go again, as if being a member of the "Cerebral Police" wasn't hard enough, these fricking hardware fetishists spring this "Anniversary of 31 Days of the Dragon" subversion bull universally again!
They think they are the only ones who need the undisputed zenith of mobile “Crysis 2035 fragging” unadulterated joy! And even on my considered ample state remuneration I couldn’t afford this beauty if I included both kidneys on the galaxian black-market. They just don’t make movies viewing like they use to. Cerebral holographic projections just don’t have the colour depth, contrast and brightness of 1080p blue Ray playback on this HP 20 inch baby, so I am reliably informed.
I don’t own a single Blu-Ray piece of hardware, never mind the ultimate in mobile multimedia and gaming option like the HP. I want to be able to display my HP 20 inch laptop on the inter-galaxy bus, train and hypersonic plane journeys knowing that I’ll be the envy of every other Orchard-book (formerly known as Macbook) 17 inch fair going mug without their “HP 20 Inch going-on”. I’m told you can do the old-fashioned scan, prints, fax and make photo prints in real time “off-world hardware styli”, no department intervention, hardware p0_n will never feel so good again.
Getting back to these “Dragon zealots” they're just like a virus, every year they reappear, sneakier and more determined to revive their prophecy that the "31 days of the Dragon", will open a wormhole to the original 2008 competition. Can’t they get their hardware fetish fixes like the rest of us, off-world (damit off-galaxy), as if I haven't got enough to do in UK-World (New Earth 17).
Wait a minute, what just happened, who typed that last paragraph! Sorry about that slip my beloved schizophrenia mistress; the cerebral implant suppressor must have gone offline. Dam, can get it back it in hyperspace now. Of course I know that there hardware fetish can't be satisfied without anything but the ultimate mobile, Crysis 2035 fragging, multimedia enhancing, cerebral beating “joy of love” that is the original HP Pavilion HDX LAN master-chief. I suppose they want to feel their hardware like the rest of us, not just sense it via cerebral memory algorithms.
The more I read about the original day one first entries @ AbsoluteVista.com, the more it seems they couldn't have known what they had started. Their competition rules stated that the "entrants" were allowed to get creative and enter the competition multiple times. Little did they know of 31 years later a whole " small business " industry would have grown around this phenomenon / religion, stating the second coming of the "uber hardware revolution", especially to the original HP 20 inch laptop that started it all off. Some say to the zenith of 21st century hardware, but I say until you've actually held it how could you possibly know, bar the Futuremark score results that is? That’s why it has to be mine, I’m going to infiltrate this sect and claimed the bounty for myself, I know it will enhance my credit rating socially (pull some geek-fem's in the process) and allow me to continue my obsession with all bloggs information technology related, 24/7, in the loo, in the garden & in my bed, who needs to sleep, sleep is for wimps and these meds do a wonderful job of keeping your eyes open on a 20 inch impeccable display. Maybe they could make me an intergalactic ambassador for HP and I could get away from this crummy job.
Anyway because of this I am pulling double shifts in the next 31 days, sayonara to my trip to Pleasure-world 46, so as far as I'm concerned it has to be mine, as it fits my motorised wheelchair perfectly, which my current Sony VGN-U50 5 inch screen laptop inadequately doesn’t (see photo). Yes, anyway these hardware zealots need sorting (by fair means or foul) before the 27 billion galaxian credits annually spent on potential and actual wormhole terrorists gets used in the next 31 days. Plus if I have the HP for myself, & create a cover story, I’ll be doing the universe some good. If you can’t beat them, subvert and join them. How hard can it be to train to be a geek-hardware-fetish-terrorist? I have done deeper and longer undercover work for the “cyborgs against sapient human inhabitants of Sol-3**militia”, I’ll just have to get used to not wearing an exoskeleton cyborg i-Orchard suit. Terrorists to fight terrorists that's my motto and I know that's what the chief of police thinks to, even though he hasn't got the balls to say it. Hell yes, how else can I be guaranteed of a decent 20th year pension if I don’t save a little galaxian credits for the Department!
Emmanuel T.L.
Greater Manchester
United Kingdom
43 years of age
Encounter
- Umm, Captain?
- Yes, Sergeant?
- We might have a problem...
- Well? I'm listening.
- The path to reality has been blocked, sir.
- Wha? What do you mean - "to reality"?
- I cannot explain it in detail, sir, but I know that a powerful machine might try to tear our reality apart and take over the control.
- Why the reality? Why should it take over the world? I order you to explain why I have no information about this?
- I have no competence to reply, sir. but please, let me get you a person who holds all the answers.
- Acknowledged. You have my permission to bring that genius to my office. Dismissed.
- Yessir! Thank you, sir!
<< After 35,54 seconds >>
- Captain, I brought you a talking dog.
- Marvellous... Can you speak doggish? Can he speak human? No? Thought so. Get me a cat to translate. << >> Thank you. Now, Beethoven, what can you bark me?
- << Translating from doggish >>
Woof... Kchem... The machine can be classified as the Dragon class. It is the most powerful I've ever seen! It has 3000 scales, 3 heads, 15 neckties-
- Enough. Don't speak gibberish - the cat can't handle it. Just tell me: can it be defeated?
- Woof! Yes, sir, but we might need some reinforcements from the programming lab.
- Understood. I appoint you the head dog to complete the task. You are allowed to use any force available, be it barking, eating or even baking... You have 30 hours. Dismissed.
<< At operation Headquarters >>
- All rwoof, men. We have an immense task on our noses and it cannot be trifled with. You have the permission to use your special powers (I will require you to demonstrate Kamehameha or Flying skill to qualify you for the task). I will assist you from the toilet. Any questions?
- Can we breathe fire?
- Yes, but you will need it only after trying the only option to defeat the monster. Be warned - you will have only two opportunities to strike. Just kidding. You will have only one. If you mess up, we'll be participating in excursion to "Highway to Hell". Understood? Good. Now go to work.
- << In unison >> Yessir!
- Commencing project "Cook the Dragon". Initiating program "The Oven". OK, now it's time to take a coffee brake...
<< "The Oven" >>
Analysing the target:
Found & identified: HP Pavilion HDX 'Dragon' Entertainment PC
Scanning the hull:
Found: * Fingerprint Reader
Assigning: Password encryption
* Webcam & Microphone
Assigning: Movie recording, karaoke, VoIP
* HP Imprint Finish (Dragon)
Assigning: Experimental use against enemies (visual disruptor)
Hull scan: Complete
Commencing deep scan:
Found: * Display: 20.1″ diagonal WUXGA High-Definition HP Ultra Brightview Widescreen
Assigning: Displaying movies, games, pictures, experiment holography
* Processor: Intel Core2 Extreme Processor X9000
Assigning: Heavy-class sumo, boxing and triathlon competitors + Anti-Dragon armor
* Memory:
4GB DDR2
Assigning: WARNING! Only 50% can be depleted. Doing what I can... Done, but failed.
Errors + 1
* Graphics Card: 512MB NVIDIA GeForce 8800M GTS
Assigning: Already assigned: Warcraft I. Cracked. Depletion successful.
* Networking: Intel(R) PRO/Wireless 4965AGN Network Connection and Bluetooth(TM)
Assigning: Unable to load drivers. Hardware malfunction. Unknown device.
* Hard Drive: 500GB 5400RPM SATA
Assigning: Speed test. Error. Error. The integer is too large. Please upgrade to FAT32
Errors + 1
* Optical Drive: Blu-Ray ROM with SuperMulti DVD+/-R/RW Double Layer
Assigning: Trying to burn 120GB on 350x speed. Successful. Depletion failed.
Errors + 1
* Entertainment: Integrated HP HDTV Hybrid TV Tuner and 4 Altec Lansing speakers + the HP Triple Bass Reflex subwoofer
Assigning: Certified for use as a sonic weapon.
* Energy Core: 9 Cell Lithium Ion Battery
Assigning: Powering a shuttle. Successful. Depletion impossible.
Errors + 1
Deep scan: Complete
Scanning cargo:
Found: * Productivity applications
Downloading. Upgrading. Upgrade complete (MS Office 97 -> MS Office 2007)
* Games
Downloading. Installing. Unable to install. Not enough disc space (Need 164010MB more)
Errors + 1
* Blu-Ray Movies
Unable to detect disc format. Please install upgraded diskette drive.
Cargo scan: Complete
Program "The Oven" has cooked the Dragon. Now, can you please let me go on holiday? It's such a sunny day and I haven't even seen the sun! Come on... So, you're not listening? OK. Let's play the hard way.
<< Connection terminated >>
- All right. Coffee brake is over. Let's see what the program has done for us. What?! Five errors and... Wait a minute. No! No no no! We're doomed! "The Oven" has betrayed us...
<< WARNING! Intruder alert! Intruder alert! >>
- It's too late! The Dragon has begun the invasion! Oh well... All hail the new master! Dragon - hooray, hip hip - hooray!
End
A Brand New Day
What would happen if two guys won an HP HDX Dragon Entertainment notebook during 31 Days of the Dragon? It depends on the guy ...
7:00 am – Ah, coffee … surely the drink of the gods. Got dressed, checked the weather on my smartphone, packed up my brand new HP Pavilion HDX in the laptop case and I'm on my way… | 7:00 am – Ah, coffee … don't know what I'd do without it. Took a shower, popped out the remote and watched the Weather Channel on my new HP Pavilion HDX. You have to love the hybrid tuner in this thing. Packed up the laptop and I'm on my way … it's going to be a nice day. |
7:30 am – Dangit! Keep forgetting that my phone has the wrong Bluetooth whatjamajigit and won't work with Sync in my Ford Edge. I've got to remember that buy that cable. Guess I'll listen to the radio. | 7:30 am – Connected the HDX to Ford Sync through Bluetooth. Works great! I'm a little old-school so streaming a little AC/DC from the HDX will help guide me through this traffic mess. Hey, there's another Ford Edge! Poor guy is banging on his head on the steering wheel. Wonder what his problem is? |
8:30 am – Time to get to work. Good thing Microsoft Office came on this laptop. | 8:30 am – The HDX is my first foray into Windows Vista so I'm a little cautious … got connected to the network … printers working ok … so far so good. Installed VM software on the HDX to create a Windows XP and a Ubuntu test environment. Having 4GB of fast RAM helps. This thing is great! |
12:00 pm – Lunchtime. Brownbagging it today so I went to the lunchroom to catch CNN. They need a bigger TV in there. | 12:00 pm – Lunchtime. Recorded an episode of Dr. Who last night on the HDX. Shut my office door, plugged in my headphones, kicked up my feet. It may not be 1080p but, honestly, I'm too old to perceive any difference. |
1:00 pm – Lunch over; back to work | 1:00 pm – That was a great episode! Blogged a little about it and posted a 30-second video clip. Now, it's back to work. Skype conference call with some folks overseas. Too bad Skype can't do video connections from five different sources – would love to use the camera in the HDX. Since Skype will allow point to point, maybe I can set up a one-on-one? |
3:00 pm – Need a break; more coffee. Apple guy poked his head in and wanted to know if I saw the new Apple commercial. I shut the door. | 3:00 pm – Coffee break. One of the Apple guys poked his head in and wanted to know if I could get some photos off an SD memory card since his MacBook Pro doesn't have any sort of card reader. No problem. Put the photos on a network drive but showed off the 20" screen and the glossy black remote on the HDX. He told me that he's waiting for a new remote to be shipped from Apple since he misplaced his original one. |
5:00 pm – Time to go home; dangit! Re-discovered my stupidphone/Bluetooth/Sync problem. Driving home in frustrated silence. | 5:00 pm – Time to go home. Winding down in the car with Barry Manilow. There's nothing wrong with Manilow! The guy is a great songwriter! He's not gay! Hey, there's that other Ford Edge again. He seems a little frustrated. |
7:00 pm – Is a DVD-ROM the same as a Blu-Ray? I don't know. Started Oblivion on my desktop PC. Had to play in some sort of blurry mode – had something to do with my video card (I have a video card?) and my CPU and my RAM. Why so many acronyms? Got killed. Don't know how. | 7:00 pm – Just got done installing Oblivion on the HDX. Loved the game on my desktop but this HDX has the ATI Radeon HD 2600 in it so I can finally play with graphic options turned on, including HDR! Sitting in the living room, watching an NBA game on the 50" plasma and playing Oblivion on the HDX. Boring basketball game (Mavs have got this one). I wonder how Oblivion would look like on the plasma? Pulled out the old wireless mouse/keyboard and found an HDMI cable lying around and … wow … this is TOTALLY AWESOME! |
9:00 pm – Watched TV for a bit. Saw an ad about some sort of converter box for digital TV signals in 2009. Wonder if my huge 25" console TV will need that? | 9:00 pm – Didn't want to quit but have a big day tomorrow. Unplugged the HDX from everything. Went into the bedroom, put the HDX on the desk and hooked in to the cable box. Popped out the remote, watched a little Leno and then set up the HDX to record Battlestar Galactica for lunch tomorrow. Going to have to try the Slingbox and Quickplay at some point. Having too much fun! |
11:00 pm – Bedtime. Oops! Forgot to check my email on my brand new HP Pavilion HDX! Guess I'll check it in the morning. | 11:00 pm – Bedtime. Oops! Forgot to check my email on my brand new HP Pavilion HDX! Guess I'll check it in the morning. |
I tried to think of a creative way to meet your requirements of the contest so I thought about what life would be like if I won the HDX. Having a mobile entertainment platform that can double as a workhorse is appealing but this laptop actually has the ability to change a lifestyle. Like TVs in the 50s and the web in the 80s, a laptop, like the HDX, that can expand productivity, enhance entertainment and provide a mobile gaming experience can represent a fundamental shift in the way we approach life.
Anyway, that's how I see it.
Rodney B.
Thaddeus & Jeroboam
"Well, yeah, but who's gonna notice one or two missing galaxies?" said a voice, nonchalantly. Its owner removed his halo and hardhat for a moment to dab away the fresh tide of sweat that had sprouted under the press of the solar work lamp. "I mean, a little schmoozing here and a bit of sweet talkin' there and the client won't even notice a few bits missing from the full set, eh?"
Atop the cloud next to him, a larger man had his bearded face buried beneath the layers of fluffy white and appeared to be searching for something. He muffled a response with a dash of venom, "Thank you, Jeroboam, that will be quite enough out of you for the moment," said Thaddeus, Ace Architect and Full Partner of Universe Unlimited, Ltd. "The client was rather specific about the quantity, and quality I should point out, of the worlds he wanted." There was more rummaging.
"Well, yeah, but come on now, you can't expect to make everyone happy," said Jeroboam. "I mean, it's not like other content producers haven't at some point in their career lost or forgotten to include at least one or two suns or black holes. I mean, this is high-stress labor, this is. Besides, it sort of adds a bit of thrilling chaos into the mix, and whatever life would have or might have developed on a particular planet isn't gonna be around to notice its home missing, now is it?" he concluded with a hint of satisfaction.
"Jer, listen," said the cloud. "It's not a question of how the tiny little life forms are going to feel nor is it about the fact that other production houses are collectively lazy enough to avoid putting the final touches on their work, like water or air. No, it's much more about the, uh--" there was a pause. "Aha! There you are!" He hoisted what appeared to be a small flask of bubbling green liquid, that bore the tarnished label of "Algae". "Can never have too much algae, eh Jer?" He smacked him on the back.
Jeroboam reared forward for a moment, then caught his balance. And breath. "Oh, um, no, no I guess you can't, can you?" he said, soothing himself from the friendly-yet painful-gesture. "Well, look, if you insist on making every curve and corner absolutely perfect, I suppose that is a credit and a testimony to your talent and dedication. And probably obsessive-compulsive tendencies."
Thaddeus gave him a look. He turned back to the task at hand and reached into his robes, producing a small eyedropper. He carefully opened the flask of green liquid and drew out what was probably a near microscopic dose of the stuff. Carefully walking over to the nearby workbench, he gently steadied a blue and green world as he lowered the eyedropper into one of the planet's oceans. With care and ceremony, he squeezed the tip and watched as the algae immediately spread out into the waters below. They readily found their respective niches with admirable speed. But then again, it was a special recipe of his, after all. He smiled at a job well done, then turned to his partner, "Right, get your mask on, Jer, we've got mountains to make."
Jeroboam replaced his hardhat and halo, as they both lowered a pair of welding masks over their face. With the clockwork efficiency of a heartbeat, the two began the process of boiling lava in such a way that the surface of the planet would shape and sculpt itself into beautiful peaks and sloping valleys. "Flamethrower," requested Jeroboam, holding out an open palm.
Without looking, Thaddeus grabbed the tool from a nearby table and placed it in his hand. "Flamethrower," he confirmed.
As Jeroboam boiled lava around a landmass that resembled a boot, he attempted to make conversation. "Listen, I can understand wanting to build things to perfection as much as the next omnipotent entity, but I gotta tell ya' Thad, you seem a bit, I dunno, strung out about this job?" he said, finding it difficult to find just the right word. "I mean, even more so than usual, especially for you."
Thaddeus watched him perform his craft with ease. This was a specialty of his after all, he thought. "You noticed, huh?"
"Noticed? You might as well have been juggling day-glow orange elephants. It was clear as rain, if you ask me," he said. Then, he added, "Oh, nice job on the rain by the way; nice and varied."
"Oh, why, thank you. I thought I'd try a quilted pattern of rainfall this time around; see how the locals would like it. But to answer your question, yes, this is something of an important job, for both our client and ourselves, in actual fact."
Jeroboam paused in mid-immolation and looked at him, "Us?"
"Aye, us. Turns out that our client is up for his annual evaluation and he wanted to complete a project that he thought would wow the big man upstairs, see. So, he commissioned us to ensure that the quality of his project did not go unnoticed."
"Right. . ., so uh, what exactly does this have to do with us, anyway?"
"Well, it's complicated. But to cut a long story short, essentially the guy was going on and on about some kid named Timbo who is eventually gonna sprout up on this planet, at some point. And I was thinkin' 'Ok, kid named Timbo, just a face in a crowd, one of many, not to terribly important' you know, stuff like that."
"Yes, I should quite like that you get to the point, if you would be so kind," said Jeroboam.
"Right, well," he hunkered down into a story-telling stance. "Basically, the guy kept saying that this kid was going to need a new computer, whatever one those is, to do some writing, right? Kid's a writer of sorts, and all he's gonna have is a desktop, said the guy, which is nice and all but he said that it'll sort of limit the times and places that little Timmy's able to sit down and scrawl out stuff. Anyway, so the kid apparently will eventually be shopping around and will happen across one that'll particularly catch his eye. They're going to call it the, uh," he ran a finger down a clipboard on the workbench. "The, uh, 'HP Pavilion HDX, valued at over $5,100', looks like. Thing is, and here's the squishy bit," he said.
Jeroboam leaned forward and listened expectantly.
"Basically," said Thaddeus, "the client wants to make 100% absolutely certain that the kid gets the thing because if he doesn't, than you and me, my friend, will not exist." He let the sentence hang there in the air for a moment.
Jeroboam's face said, ". . . What?"
Thaddeus continued, "Yeah, see, this took me a while to get too. But basically, according to this guy-and he seemed to know what he was talking about-if the kid isn't able to get the unit, then he therefore won't be able to write, and therefore the whole concept of you, me, the world, this universe and everything beyond will cease to be; it won't be written. I mean, I didn't quite understand it myself, but the guy kept mumbling something about 'quantum entanglement' and 'multiverse potentials' and stuff like that. But anyway, according to this guy, the entire universe is on the line for this one. So if it wouldn't be too much trouble, I'd kindly ask if you could put aside the jokes and the ha-ha's for a little while so we can get this job done," he said.
"Oh. . .," said Jeroboam. "Well, yeah, I suppo--"
"Jer! Watch what you're doing!" shouted Thaddeus.
Jeroboam's eyes shot directly back to the boot-shaped landmass whose lava he was heating up. A small, bloated protrusion had formed on the surface and was trembling slightly. They both watched with bated breath as the tiny protrusion jiggled once. Then twice. Then hiccupped a little before a devastating volcanic eruption spewed forth from the tip. Jeroboam gulped. "Oops."
Trying to swallow back his bile, Thaddeus said, "Jer. Put down the flamethrower. Please. And go check on the planet's moon. If you would. Please." He paused occasionally to allow time for potential outbursts to subside.
Jeroboam did so and scurried off into the other room.
Thaddeus turned back to his work and tried to release his frustration. After considering punching stars or grumbling into his cloud, he settled on: "Eh, I suppose it doesn't really matter. I mean, the kid's probably just gonna surf websites about lap-based computers all day, anyway."
Name: Shaina K.
Country: USA
Locality in Country: Vernon, CT
Age: 24
Occupation: Stay-at-home mom/totally-freakin'-awesome-gamer wife
Story: The Ultimate L33t
Somewhere between Duke Nukem and Lara Croft, this superhero was created (this superhero of whom enjoys speaking of herself in the third person). It's difficult to precisely measure where and at exactly what point in time she came about, but by now, one should know enough about the birds and the bees to assume the 'how.'
This she-superhero is unlike any other superhero the flagellants of the earth have ever believed existed. No sir, this is not your average run-of-the-mill, glass-wearing, petty individual by day and underwear-over-the-tights, "it's a bird, it's a plane," (yadda yadda yadda) hero by night – this superhero fights all her battles in *dun dun duuuun* cyberspace…
… although, she still wears glasses even as a superhero…
"Yeah, but I'm still a hot looking glass-wearer!"… right, prove it then Miss Jennifer Garner/Angie Harmon Superhero chic.
"Can't – don't have a webcam, but you can just take my word for it."
Freaktard"What was that all-knowing and belligerent narrator?"
… so getting on with the story…
She works in the dark troughs in the midnight hours, maniacally driven by the amount of nemeses of which she cannot overcome. She's taken on some of the most gut-wrenching, gruesome, puke-worthy tasks, but the truly noteworthy foes that she cannot strike down, live on not because of her lack of ability, but because she simply does not hone the power or speed to allow her to continue in her quest.
*Blue Screen*
Please press any key to continue.
"Dammit!"
Yes, and that's the other reason.
So as she was readying herself for another night of terror-packed adventure in which to rekindle the fact that she was the awesome above all awesomes against her carefully chosen opponents in cyberspace (and a few more blue screens later), she checked her email for the next rendezvous.
And then she saw it…
Given to her by her best friend (and ally in cyberspace)…
The email that changed her priorities forever (or at least for the next month)…
The one…
The only...
The ultimate…
The totally awesome…
"Ooooh yesss!" (Can you feel the climax of suspense yet?)
… HP Pavilion HDX Dragon Laptop!!!
Her eyes glued to the screen, she read through and through, again and again the details of the competition at stake. She had more adrenalin now than the time she found the secret to destroying the leaping dog boss in the blue-clad jumpsuit from Commander Keen when she was seven! (And there was no other memorable or greater victory in the history of her life than the moment she crushed that darn dog boss under a ceiling of brick!)
Until now…
Many thoughts flew through her mind of the power and control she could gain with this large, powerful and fierce piece of equipment. The first was the thought of looking through 64-bits of the ultimate Windows has ever offered, helping her to gaze upon the enemy, calculated and controlled. Being given the potential of piecing together tactics and studying the journals of others who have been there and seen the destruction without interruption…conversing with those who may clue her in on secrets or hints. Having the chance to map out and create write-ups of the impending doom without another freeze-up due to an overheating and overworked module… oh for the chance to backup saved documentation!
Then she began fondling the thought of the curves, the edges and the functions of the unit. She imagined being given the capability of caressing the true AllSpark of the computer world on the tips of her fingers. Just to be able to turn on and be granted access with one tantalizing finger. She dreamed that she could see the visual of 20.1 inches of hardcore action and suspense – to stroke the keyboard with firm and decided hands. And believe me, this woman can definitely handle all 20.1 inches of it and use it well.
(We all know size and speed are both a superhero's - as well as a woman's - best friend).
Oh to take advantage of these foes by having a nice, deep subwoofer capable of hearing the essence of footsteps behind her; the enemy's breathe on her shoulders. Or the speed and agility of a true video card in which to have continual play by play without one pixel out of place.
Oh, if one could only perceive the joining of woman to machine to create the ultimate super-cyber concoction – the only true cyber hero. This would be the meanest, bad-ass pair ever to be joined to destroy Illidan, Diablo, Sauron, the Zerg, the Protos, or even Kerrigan!
Nothing prepared her for the intoxication she felt as her fantasy came into full focus – the ecstasy…
The tension building…
The suspense beyond believe…
The climax of excitement…
"Ooooh yessss,"….
*Blue Screen*
Please press any key to continue.
"Dammit!" Need it be said that this happens a lot.
She had to come down from this high somehow. She hurried into her bedroom to find the first Star Wars DVD her eyes set gaze upon.
First, she spotted the sealed Blu-ray DVD of her all-time favorite Terminator 2: Judgment Day she was gifted from her brother; her richer, fad-seeking, always successful (and highly vindictive with a passion for buying his sister things she could never use due to lack of equipment) brother.
Frantic with a new heated nature, she tore up her bedroom – DVDs, underwear and stuffed animals flying in all directions. And then finally, she caught sight of A New Hope…
… until she remembered…
"Damn, my DVD player was destroyed by an incident with a candle and a bottle of lavender massage oil."
So that decided her on the spot, she had to possess this HP Pavilion HDX Dragon Laptop somehow. She decided that there was no turning back – the power and control of this decked-out device that could finally achieve her l33t status was too vital to pass up. She sat down with a pen and notepad (in fear of another document going out the electrical window), a bowl of ravioli (from the most famous of chefs), and a can of Mountain Dew and began writing.
If this super-cyber-glass(thong)-wearing-hero-chic-l33t was to continue in her disposition of defeating disproportionate enemy knit-wits, she had to outdo them in their own demented dimensions. And no time was better for her than now, because frankly…
"It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum… and I'm all outta gun!"
Will she do it? Tune in -
*Blue Screen*
Please press any key to continue.
"Dammit!"
Tune in Friday May 9th to find out.
*Hiss* Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
Kevin Kirchmar told me of The Baby Foundation, and the work they are doing to bring critical healthcare services to kids in Northeast Colorado.
Founded by Dr. Michelle Soriano of Women's Clinic of the Plains, the charitable organization tries to major healthcare issues resolved for indigent citizens.
He suggested that I donate the Dragon to the charity where it would be raffled off at their next fundraiser.
It killed me not to be able to do that.
However, I have authorized the purchase of an HP notebook computer at the time of their next fundraiser for the same goal.
Keep it up Kevin & Michelle!
(The system will be donated by to the foundation on behalf of my family and all ventures I am associated with.)
I cannot bang this drum loud enough: there are 30 more chances other than the one on this site to win this baby!
Ars Technica is running theirs, due May 10.
Electric Punk at OSNN is also running a fairly easy contest, winner to be selected May 11. All the way from Jolly Old Blighty!
Over at Jkontherun.com, James Kendrick will give away a Dragon on May 12.
Barb at Barb's Connected World will be freeing one of those beasts to a lucky soul on May 13
My buddy Steve Hughes at BostonPocketPC.com will do the same on May 14.
Starting today, the Gadgeteer will be running their own giveaway due May 15.
The following contests start on May 9, and be given away starting May 16: